On Monday this week I got a tooth pulled. Although I didn’t initially search out some sort of corrolation to being single, it kind of hit me dead on as I was sitting in the dentist chair. Breaking up is a lot like surgery. Some surgeries are necessary. They’re required to keep people alive. Some are to remove ‘dead weight’ and others are to replace vital organs. Some surgeries are ones of convenience in order for us to look or feel better. But the end result is always the same. Big or little- they always end in a healing period. The bigger surgeries, much like the bigger break-ups, take a long time for the wound to heal. It may require therapy, or staying in bed for a few days. The end result may be a change in diet or exercise.
The ‘surgery’ that I had on Monday wasn’t necessary. Maybe someday it would have been, but for now, they did it to keep me from any more pain in the future. I thought about it later that day. The dull ache that I felt after the surgery that wasn’t necessary, but pre-emptive. Maybe it was more like my break-up than I thought. The pain that I felt was minimal- in fact, the dentist told me that the tooth had come out easily, and they weren’t even going to have to stitch it up. Similarly, my last break up, although painful, was over easily and I was back to my day to day life quickly.
I know this is not the way of all break ups. In fact, my previous relationship was more like going through cancer treatments considering all the damage that was done- but that’s another story. But sometimes these relationships ending serve to push us toward something new, something better. It’s been several days now since my tooth was pulled- and I still feel that dull ache. The faint throbbing that tells me that something is missing. Maybe missing is the wrong word. It tells me that something had once been there, and isn’t anymore. That’s why I think it’s okay to miss people that have gone from our lives. Even though they once felt like they belonged, in the long run it’s possible that having them there would have done more harm than good.
Anyway- that’s all I’ve got. Now that I think about it, it’s a little cheesy that I’m using something like having a tooth pulled as an analogy for a break-up. But there it is. I felt like it was something I needed to write- if only just so that I would stop thinking about it.
I’ve got my 2 books picked out for January, and I’m currently in the middle of both of them. My selections as well as my ‘reviews’ of them so far are coming up soon!!